He who Dares Make a Complaint!!

[eliznew412]

I am shocked at what I've been put through with making a complaint. I was escorted to a seminar room and was told only literally just less than 5 mins befrore the meeting that it would be recorded.

I sat in a very large meeting room with the clinical head of the team opposite me and unit manger next to me. I had been told to send an "Agenda" and although I duly did so it was referred to as "various correspondence".

The recording device was placed in the middle of the table and I was left talking for almost 1hr, at times getting quite emotional.

I won't go into further details as I will now have to take my case further, externally.

I did however comment that they should give prior warning that the meeting would be recorded. It would put anyone with a nervous disposition into quite a state trying to hold forth with their little dictator recorder going. No tissues, no glass of water.

Whatever the complaint or the outcome I do think they should think about what they put a patient through.

Sadly the unit I attend is not the only one to conduct themselves like this, in a defence and unsympathetic way. With tight budgets I think it just begs for hospitals to be run in a non-patient centred way. After all anything that doesn't kill you and is about emotional sensitivity, patient centred is a luxury. I mean it doesn't kill you does it? So what do I expect? Actually I think years and years of insensitivity compounded by a bit of rough for the hospital does kill you....slowly, but it does in the end. So many of us, including doctors tend to go by appearances. For example if you look ok and sound ok ...wel your ok. And the times your not, well you can talk to somebody and sometime. But if you have ever experienced long periods of time when you can't and people turning against you, it leaves a scar. Not a big one at first, but it gets bigger and bigger. So you learn to put up and shut up and get depressed. Then you learn to put on a brave face and then everyone thinks your resilient and you can get over it.

I gave the example of Frances Andres Andrade. She appeared to be resilient but a repeat of similar treatment years later traumatised her again. And their case - doctors aren't psychologists. It defies commonsense to dish up more of the same years later just because you look ok and even manage to hold forth for an hour. But its cost me. I'm knackered, drained and feeling humiliated by the experience, and even more angry that I have to go to stage 3, an ombudsman.

I was even told this wasn't the right way to go about things, however I am still in the dark about the right way of going up things is.

I found it quite intimidating. The only reason I was able to say anthying at all was because I worked in a call centre where you are recorded all the time and getting continual monitoring and challenged as to how you need to improve. I felt totally unsupported.

Feedback was Outcomes and instructions as to what they expect from me. It all seems so cleeky and geared up against the patient. It has left me feeling very low.

He who dares though, does win in the long run if they can hang on. Without some patients finding the courage to speak up about rough experience nothing improves and even renal advocacy would carry no weight with a good dose of courage from patients. Time surely to break the "Old boys'" club defensive attitude? With tight budgets surely the loss of a patient centred Renal unit ethos is too high a price to pay. Its too strifling by half and I have to say the meeting was sadly dislosing about the general culture.

Predialysis has certainly been a weird experience and no one expected it to last 6 long years and counting. But I have to say inspite of how tough its been its all a very previous time and has proved very valuable time indeed, if only to to be able to recognise who I am and what I want and what has been done to me. Inspite of all the critisism I've had pounded against me, I must be doing something very right to last this long. However would have believed its the emotional side and lack of support though and the hospital culture that has been the very worst of it all to date? It would be nice to think that it was appreciated as a learning curve when a pateint actually describes the "ride" and wonders how things could be improved?...sadly its not quite like that.

[JMan]

Hey Liz... hang in there..

It sucks.. but in my experience is also that the NHS complaints system is there to cover the ass of management not improve services..

The very tiered method of complaints itself is time consuming for the patient, maybe they hope we'll give up, or die before anything gets done.. One only has to look at some of the recent news of coverage of certain hospitals to see how bad things are..


Hope we can meet in Bristol this year..

J

[Thumps]

If it helps at all, I would consider the meeting being recorded to be standard and definitely a Good Thing, as it means whatever THEY say is recorded as well as your story. You're clearly not going to be untruthful, so it's to your benefit, not theirs.

[Shinto]

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[Tibbs]

At the next meeting, take your own recording device with you.

[Grey]

As I see it behind all this there has been a "taking of sides" although the detail has not been divulged, there is clearly a them and us scenario. That is in itself the problem. The sooner we learn that confronting, as in "making a complaint" flies in the face of developing a good relationship with our care providers and only puts their backs up, often resulting in us getting worse service. It is human nature to dislike and oppose criticism and the person on the other side will simply say below their breath....I will do as little as possible for you now justenough to avoid getting into trouble.

I am not for a second proposing that one does not have a right to having issues questioned or resolved, but rather the way you go about it really matters and can often get the very best for you. Rather than be confrontational, pose the issue in a "I need your help here" sort of way, create the feeling that you know just how well positioned they are to help you and appeal to their soft human side for help. My expeceince is that as soon as they see your gentle non confrontional attitude and realise that it is within their power to actually do some good in the system, and end up feeling great about it after helping you, the better for all.

Bottom line is to remove the “them and us” scenario and turn it into a humanitarian issue where it is clear we appreciate their help that they are in a position to be our saviours or guardian angles and most health professionals will go the extra mile and you will get more than you expected.

[JMan]

just as a general topic its an interesting thing.. THere's been a number of times I've complained.. Some issues were resolved, others not.
I remember distinctly asking once for a complaints form.. And was refused one, or I think the excuse might have been. We don't have any.

A couple of times when I have complained I've used some fairly standard points which allow the other party to sort out the situation before it gets too far.
Setting a deadline for THEIR reply. Time is of the essence.
I hope this can be resolved so there is no need for further action.

.. Ok thats a bit threatening, but it shows your not to be fobbed off.

I do not wish others to experience this problem.. That's pretty good, it shows concern for the overall care of all the other patients. Not just a ME & YOU situation.

Only once have I had to just walk away from a unit as it I feared for my life. And the level of care was completely against my ethics or any commonsense.. Such can be private healthcare.

Sadly things often escalate out of hand and its a bit like dealing with Inland Revenue or the DWP.. Immensely stressful.. when there could really be a simple answer..