Page 1 of 1

Doc appt. today

Posted: Fri May 14, 2004 6:57 pm
by nycpetit
Well..my creatine clearance is up to 5 and something (some change...lol) and I am starting some poly citric stuff for the acid in my blood..and more phosphate binders.....

we are pushing for surgery this summer...I wish i could have held out longer....

believe it or not...at this time the best possibility is my ex-fiance....he is the youngest and the best shape so far....

how weird is that

there are no other family members aside from my stepdad who have even gone for the blood type testing...so i am sort of out of luck here..many many young cousins..no answers..not even a phone call....

I know how personal the decision is....but I can personally be angry too...can't I?

I have a cousin coming here to "Have girl time" and party for one day...from Denver..who said she just couldn't get her blood work done at her normal doctor and hasn't gone to get it done yet..this was six weeks ago....

I just don't feel like entertaining.....

sorry this is so pessimistic...i realize that I TOO have the right to form my own opinions...and while I wouldn't share them with them...i can share them here...no?

thanks for reading

Natalie

Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 9:17 am
by Rik
Hi Natalie :0)
what a turn around!! ... that your Ex is looking the best one to be your donor!!... do I understand it that he is willing to donate if he can lady?? ... (if thats the case I take back all those impolite words I uttered under my breath about him when you were first here on the board!!!!)

you can be as angry and as pessimistic as you like lady ... you are entitled to be at times ... but you never know whats around the next corner ... so keep a smile handy in case you need it eh!! :wink:

hope your feeling a wee bit happier now that you were when you posted ... but thats what we are all here for ... to support each other no matter what crap life throws our way eh!! :wink:

:0)

Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 12:41 pm
by Christy Zootman
Natalie,

I think all on this board would agree that when those we are closest to let us down--it really hurts. My brother told me in the early stages of my kidney disease he would donate a kidney. As the time came a little closer he changed his mind. I was angry at him although I didn't say much. My husband isn't a match and my grown daughters still want to have more children.( the hospital I am going to has a rule that women who want to still have children should not be a donor.) The person who was willing to be my donor and went through the evaluation was my son-in-law. Sometimes the Lord works in mysterious ways. Has your ex gone through all his testing? You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Christy

Posted: Mon May 17, 2004 5:50 pm
by Dionne
Natalie,
VENT, VENT, VENT!!!!!!!!!! I'm sure many here understand what you're feeling. Sometimes, those close to us just aren't up to the challenge. I think a lot of folks have been disappointed by family or frineds who are scared quite frankly and don't know how to handle their fears, guilt, etc.

But, hearing that your ex may be a possible candidate is positive. Is he willing to donate? If so, that's great. Life sure does have a way of thowing us curves from time to time.

In the meantime, take care of yourself. I do hope you have a resolution soon.

Dionne

thanks guys

Posted: Tue May 18, 2004 12:54 am
by nycpetit
well..yes, my ex has had two rounds of his tests...he's 30, blood type is fine..and has never smoked, etc...so I guess that it's a distinct possiblity...

yes..I am glad that you all know what I mean..I feel "mean" to think it..would never say it to those people who have simply never replied to my letter...as a matter of fact..an aunt of mine, who lost her son freakishly (he fell asleep and didn't wake up at the age of 27) three years ago..sent me an email today that literally never mentions my illness..she wants to know if I will be attending a bday bash for her mother (my grandmother) tells me she is starting piano lessons..and not once does she mention what I am going through...or ask how I am feeling....

Rik..you and I (and Cheryl) had choice words for this ex..and yes..he still seems willing to donate..my stepfather has gone for testing as well...bless his heart..he did not know what he was getting himself into when he married my Mom (LOL)

thank you guys for understanding..aside from throwing a wet towel at the wall from time to time..it's hard to just let it out sometimes...don't want to let it out on those who simply don't understand..you know????

N

Posted: Tue May 18, 2004 9:03 am
by Rik
I'm sure I far to young naive and innocent to even know as to which words you may be inferring missy!!! :shock:
but whatever you and especially Cheryl may have said ... he is kinda going up in my estimation :0)

I would offer you one of mine as I have two spare ... but I'm not sure if they post too well?? ... would FedEx be better?? :0)

in the mean time you look after yourself lady ... and vent away whenever you like ...

:0)

Re: Doc appt. today

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 12:11 am
by LadySycamore
nycpetit wrote:there are no other family members aside from my stepdad who have even gone for the blood type testing...so i am sort of out of luck here..many many young cousins..no answers..not even a phone call....Natalie
Hello Natalie. I saw this post and the snippet that I highlighted stuck out. I tried to talk to my family about the possibility of being a donor back in 2002. Basically, all I got was, "We'll pray for you!" and one email from a cousin that got upset that I told the family over the internet (as if I was going to jack up my phone bill on long distance telling eveyone individually!). So, I understand a bit of what you are going through. I'm not sure if my fiance will be eligible or not...we really haven't discussed it at length. I may have to find a non related donor. I plan on asking the family about it one more time, but this time, I'm armed with more information than I was two years ago. We'll see how it goes.

Good luck! 8)

Isn't Life Grand

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 9:29 pm
by johnsor
Greetings Natalie:
It is sooo difficult to solicit donors. I really felt very uncomfortable when it came to asking friends and relatives. My wife was wrong blood type. My oldest brother had high blood pressure and really lobbied to be the donor, but they said he would be a last resort. My cousin (40s) wanted to be a donor and his mother told him that I could wait for a cadaver. My sister ended up being the donor, yet I received a call from her husband telling me he was against her donating. In the end, my sister told her husband it was her decision to make and not his decision. I think information can be very helpful for a potential donor. If they can talk with someone who has donated it helps alleviate their fears. It is truly amazing that there are strangers ("great" samaritans) who will donate to someone they have never met in their life because they believe it is the right thing to do. The best to you and continue to believe the transplant will happen. If not now, sometime in the near future.