want to have children!

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Re: want to have children!

Postby patricia99 » Sat May 21, 2016 4:01 pm

We also didn't have all sum of money to pay by one payment. And it's risky to pay whole amount at once. We never know what will wait for us tomorrow! We chose standard package for €39 900. It was divided into 5 parts. We paid €8000 after signing contract with the clinic. €7900 we paid during our second visit. Third payment €8000 we paid on twelve weeks of the gestation of our surrogate mother. Fourth part of €8000 we paid after the delivery. And the last 5th payment €8000 we paid after receiving needed documents for our daughter. The clinic has other packages. I remember there was economy for approximately €30 000 and vip for €50 000. You can see all prices, terms, conditions and photos on their website. I don't remember all details, sorry. I could miss something. Speaking about translator, taxi, accommodation, food and smartphones. All these services are already included into packages. You won't need to look for all that by yourself. We didn't pay some extra fees. The clinic never asked to pay some other fees. So the only amount we spent were that sum set in our contract. Your're right, prices become very high after birth of a child. Our girl is growing up and spendings grow with her. So there is no spare cash! That's why we chose this clinic. It has professional doctors and provides good services. I don't know what would I do without this clinic! Prices in USA are prohibitive for us. Speaking about Greece, prices there not really differs from US. So Ukrainian clinic was like a light at the end of the tunnel. I should say I've never regret I used this procedure. Of course we faced some difficulties. But now we have our daughter and she's our world!
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Re: want to have children!

Postby Emillly4t » Sun May 22, 2016 10:57 am

Thanks for so detailed answer! I'm really glad to know all those services are already included in general sum. I can't even imagine how would I find all that stuff by myself. It probably would cost a lot. But it's nice that the clinic has already considered every single detail. I like the fact we can pay in parts. There will be time to collect money. And you don't have to give everything and then have empty pockets. How long did it take for them to find surrogate mother for you? I know that sometimes search of surrogate mother can take half of the year and more. I've read about couple from UK. They had been waiting for surrogate mother more than a year! I'm ready to wait actually. I understand that doctors can't just snap their fingers and give us surrogate mother. But I just can't wait anymore and want process to begin! Is there a possibility to choose surrogate mother by yourself? And did she live with you? I know that sometimes surrogate mothers live in clinics. In this way doctors can control them. I'm afraid that she may do something wrong. This can cause harm to a baby. I've read some stories and they scared me to death. I remember a story about couple from US. They had surrogacy in Mexico. Their surrogate mother lived in Mexico during the procedure. She lost their baby. As it appeared, she was smoking, drinking and even used drugs! It's horrible story. How could she behave in such way? Poor couple, they put so much hope in that clinic and surrogate mother. They paid money for clinic to find healthy woman who would care about their baby. And here is the result... I don't know if it's even possible to believe in success after such experience. I think it's hard to live so far away from your baby…Even if it isn't born yet.
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Re: want to have children!

Postby patricia99 » Sun May 22, 2016 11:16 am

That's a very sad story. I can't even imagine how painful it was to that couple. I think blame is on doctors of that Mexican clinic. Because of their negligence and irresponsibility innocent child died. Speaking about our surrogate mother. The clinic found our sm in 2,5 months after our first visit. We thought it will take much longer. So when our program coordinator told us this news we were on seventh heaven! We didn't choose sm by ourselves. It doesn't matter how she looks. The most important is her health, ability to carry a baby and presence of her own children. That's why our doctor chose sm for us. Their doctors make all psychological and medical tests to be sure that woman is suitable for the procedure. Also they check sm during the program weekly. Our sm was 30 years old. She has her own healthy kids. So we knew she had all chances to carry our baby. Also our program coordinator was informing us about state of our baby and sm at least once per month. Speaking about our sm's place of living during the program. She lived with her family. All of surrogate mothers have their own kids. It would be wrong to take them away from their families. I think it's better for them to live in familiar environment. In such way they feel themselves comfortable. They don't worry about their loved ones. The fewer their worries are, the better for our child. Of course it was hard. I was nervous all the time. I tried to stay positive and believe in the best. The clinic was informing us and each letter was like a relief. Also we were coming for planned ultrasounds. All this gave us some confidence and calmness.
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Re: want to have children!

Postby Emillly4t » Mon May 23, 2016 9:54 am

I'm greatly surprised! The clinic found surrogate mother for you for such short period of time. I understand that probably in some cases it may take longer, who knows. But it won't take more then half of the year or a whole year. So this news made me happy! I completely agree that surrogate mothers should live with their families. It's hard to be thousands miles away from your baby during 9 months. But we should also think about feelings of surrogate mothers. They help us to become parents. They care about our baby. They carry our babies for us. They make a great thing! So we should consider their needs and desires too. They will nervous less and they will be calm surrounded by relatives in their native home. Were there problems with documents for your daughter? I have absolutely no idea how to arrange everything in a right way in Ukraine. I guess some documents for child to leave the country will be needed. How to make everything right? I'm scared that police will take my baby away from me in the airport. And it will be my fault! I'm afraid I'll make something wrong. I know I'm thinking up new problems. I really want to be prepared for everything. I want to find all answers and solution. I understand that each procedure has its own difficulties. Our procedure may differ from yours. But I hope and believe it will be the same! So the result will be successful. I want to take home healthy baby. I want everything to be smooth. I hope for your advices! Thank you for your patience)
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Re: want to have children!

Postby patricia99 » Mon May 23, 2016 1:53 pm

You're welcome honey! Speaking about documents, we also had no idea how to make everything legal. There are another rules and conditions in strange country. You never know for sure how to organize documents if you have no clue about their legislation. I also had some fears. I was imagining that something will go wrong in the airport during our leaving. Such thoughts disturbed me all the time. But we had no troubles at all. So you have nothing to worry about. The clinic provided us with help in preparation of all documents. I also had no idea where to go and how to organize everything right. The clinic provided us with assistance in the Ukrainian civil registry office. We've got the child’s birth certificate there. And of course they helped us in getting a travel pass for our daughter. There were no problems in the airport. All documents were 100% legal. So everything was fine and we weren't cast without help.
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Re: want to have children!

Postby Emillly4t » Mon May 23, 2016 2:35 pm

Thank you so much for all this info! It's really hard to find good clinic nowadays. There are so many clinics! Unfortunately not all of them have professional doctors. I've read so many reviews about failed surrogacy procedures. And there was negligence of doctors almost in all cases! Also the fact that there are so many scammers makes the search even harder. Their amount grows with each year. You never know for sure whom you speak with. There are so much cases when people try to find sm by themselves. Usually such 'experiments' end with total failure. I'm happy I found this forum. Now I know what to consider and where to move. I have a strong feeling this time I'll make it. So much nerves and efforts were spent. I appreciate your help! I wish both of us all the best. I hope we'll have new member in our family very soon.
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Re: want to have children!

Postby rheaybou » Mon May 23, 2016 9:23 pm

Is this just my sceptical mind or does this conversation sound like two Eastern Europeans pushing surrogacy in Ukraine?

I'm sure it probably is just in my mind, but when it smells fishy!
Now 35 with Alports and I had my first kidney-versary 18th feb 2013....I hope to have many more.

My living donor and his family are doing all well.

==
Alports.
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Re: want to have children!

Postby DeanH » Tue May 24, 2016 10:39 am

I agree Rheaybou, it doesn't sound quite right to me
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